My Transplant Coordinator called yesterday to tell me there is still no word on the donor swap. I was not aware that she is not allowed to know anything ...not even who my donor is until all tests are in and a decision is made. I do know a final test is due in on Monday though. I have to admit my nerves are on edge and I really need to apologize to my dear hubby for biting his head off at every turn. I don't mean to do it ...I  know  he won't judge me and understands because he is going through it with me. It's not fair to him and just because I don't feel well is not an excuse to be mean! I promise to try harder. I love you Kevin...thank you for putting up with my mood swings. I am reminded of these beautiful words written by one of my favorite concert pianist 'live to love during hard times'.... and it comes back to you and gives you strength.

There was an article published a while back about a study done on people with advanced stage of kidney failure I believe it was Nephrology Today or something like that...can't remember. It said....that we experience the same symptoms as someone with advanced cancer. The study concluded there needed to be more research and ways to alleviate our pain and discomfort. Most pain medicine is not an option because it further damages the kidneys. I am one of those people who tries to 'tough it out' until I can't take it anymore. Not really a good way to be. I have a health management nurse who calls to check on me and is always surprised when I tell her I am okay.

I really am okay...just uncomfortable and have felt much worse than this. It has not been a bad day all in all and last night I rode in the Christmas Parade with my children and grandchildren! We had so much fun and made such good memories! That is what life is all about...enjoying every single moment you can. And that means being sweeter to my dear hubby as well. He deserves a medal!